Katrina Team Testimony

For about two years I have felt an urge, desire or calling to put my name in for a mission trip. I always found a reason or excuse that I shouldn’t do it. I thought maybe I wasn’t mission material. I read my Bible, but I do not have it memorized from Genesis to Revelation. I have an understanding about what the Bible says but I cannot quote chapter and verse when referring to scripture. I don’t interpret dreams or even read signs from God. I don’t have a moving testimony about how I came to know the Lord. I am what I would refer to as average. Don’t get me wrong, I want to have dreams from God and maybe I do but I don’t know it. I want to get signs from God but I am not sure how to read them. I simply believe and have faith in our Holy Father.

I was baptized at the age of thirteen and I still remember that day as if it were yesterday. I remember coming up out of the water and feeling the presence of our Savior in me. At thirteen how heavy can your load be? I know mine wasn’t heavy but I felt the burden, the bricks of life lifted off of me as I took my first breath after being immersed. I knew then that God hadn’t promised me my life would be easy, He didn’t promise me no heartache or sadness, I knew Christian have hard and troubled times, but I knew at that moment that I would never walk alone.

For several years I have kept to myself while attending church services. I am blessed that one person who reached out to me and never let me fall by the wayside is Deanna Holsinger. One day a few months ago, I was speaking to Deanna that I was feeling strongly that I should put in for a mission trip but I was nervous. I didn’t think I wanted to go to a foreign country. I said I wanted to be where they spoke English. Honestly, I was afraid and I think I was continuing to make excuses as to why I shouldn’t do this. Deanna told me that there may be another Katrina trip and I should put in for that. So I did. How hard and scary could that be? Deanna said Carson will probably be calling you this week. I couldn’t make it to the mission meeting in October as I had previous commitments for that afternoon, I decided I would be sure to make it in November. November came and the mission meeting was on the same day as my daughter’s birthday, once again I couldn’t make it. Time had passed and I had never heard from Carson. I thought, well I tried and that might have been enough but no one knows me and maybe God doesn’t need me for this.

About mid November I got a call from Mary that said they were putting together a team for Katrina and would I be able to go. I had 24 hours to decide. Surprisingly, I was able to work it out with my children, the special man in my life, my job and my ex-husband, I said yes. There was no guarantee that we would go, they were just seeing if they could get a team together. Well, days passed and the team came together and plans were made and tickets were arranged and we were going. It was now time for everyone to meet and discuss the trip. I, of course, was unable to make it to the meeting as I was out of town. I’m going on this trip, I’ve never met Carson, I don’t know any of the folks that I will be sharing this experience with and I am not sure what I’m doing.

I am a single mother. Needless to say I work outside the home. As I am preparing for this journey wrinkles began to develop in my job. The wrinkles are so severe I felt lead that it is time for me to move on. I truly believe the Lord is telling me my time is done and I need to find a new job. I began to question if I should back out of my commitment for the upcoming mission trip. Once again, it appeared I was falling back on excuses. Today I realize that Satan was playing his trump card and trying to keep me from this trip. I felt compelled to keep my commitment. Even if I had no job I was going through with going on this trip. I had to.

The Sunday prior to my departure I finally met with the rest of my group up on stage for a blessing. Afterwards we prayed together about our trip. I prayed for patience and understanding. This was my first trip. Most of the others had done trips before and they were very at ease with everything. Ken had gone before and even though he had injured his leg he was still up for the task. Laverne had gone before and she was ready. She can pray like none other. Cameron and Sabina had gone before and were excited and welcoming of everything that was to come. It was the first time for Aimee and Colin. Aimee spoke with such confidence and intelligence you would of thought she had gone before. I felt a little out of my league but I was still committed.

The day I was set to leave I started getting very sick. You know, the heavy head congestion and pressure that makes flying miserable. Again I started to think, well maybe this is a sign that I am not suppose to go. I told you earlier I wasn’t great at reading signs. Silly me, this was Satan once again trying to stop me. I decided sick or not I was going. I was scheduled to leave that Thursday night-Friday morning. I hadn’t begun to pack, I had already purchased tickets for the Christmas dinner at church and time was running out. I went to the dinner and then rushed home to begin packing. Lo and behold, I got ready. My ride picked me up and off I went to the airport. As I walked into the airport, the one member of our group that was leaving with me, Laverne had also just arrived and we checked in together. We chatted and eventually it was time to board the plane. We were not seated by one another. We didn’t see each other again until Houston where we began or trek to the next terminal to catch our flight to Gulfport. Once in Gulfport we were picked up by other volunteers from the God’s Katrina Kitchen.

We arrived at our destination around 4pm Mississippi time on Friday afternoon. We checked in and got the tour. God had truly blessed us, there was a flush toilet we could use. Don’t get me wrong there were plenty of port-a-potties, but there were also 2, yes I said 2, flush toilets we could use. Our room is a wooden box which holds 3 bunk beds made from 2X4’s. When the rest of the team shows up we’ll have four of us in there, but for right now Laverne and I had our pick of what 2 beds out of the six we wanted. We managed to spread our stuff over all six beds.

It was cold, about 39 with wind. Being from Alaska you wouldn’t think 39 is cold. Well let me tell you, we were freezing. The air is so wet and the wind was blowing and it would just push that cold wet air right through to your bones. We borrowed more blankets and a heater. I decided, heat rises so I would take an upper bunk. I couldn’t feel my toes, my fingertips or even my nose. I did not bring hat, gloves, scarf or even a heavy winter coat. Everyone told me it would be hot. After all I was going to the South.

Friday night we had church at 7:30. Church is always at 7:30 Monday through Friday at the Kitchen. The service was about being who God wants us to be, not who we want to be. We are to glorify God and not ourselves. We were reminded that he has given us all talents and we should use those talents to serve him without praising ourselves.

Before we left I had received a packet of papers from the church and it had various information, but mostly it was a daily journaling tool. The first page was “My Letter to God.” Here’s what I wrote:

I am here on this mission trip to hopefully serve you. I have felt a desire to volunteer for about 2 years. It is my belief it is your calling, please use me as you see fit. Please help me to listen to you, help me hear you. Lord, you know this is another trying time in my life, please help me understand the message you are sending to me. Lord, I wonder sometimes whether I do things your way, I believe I try, if I am not, please mold me to be what you want. I hope the trip helps me grow and serve you better. It is a step out of my comfort zone, but I know you’re with me and I am safe. Thank you Lord. Thank you for this opportunity to serve you to grow.

Well, after services I did my devotions and tried preparing myself for what ever was next. That night during devotions I found myself at the point of tears for many reasons, but the biggest was because I truly felt God was hearing me and was right there holding my hand and helping my through. Since everything was so out of my comfort zone, normally I would have had an extremely hard time. God was there with me, helping me hear His word and to serve Him.

Saturday began early in the morning. I cooked 30 pounds of bacon. Again, I met some wonderful people. Phil was the gentleman I had the pleasure of working side by side with all morning. He is a full time volunteer down there. He normally works on construction sights throughout the week. On Saturdays he cooks for all who need to eat and for the other long term volunteers, he makes omelets and fried potatoes. Gracious sakes, were those potatoes good. He shared his story with me of how he came to the Lord. It was so moving. He has been down there since Greg picked him up hitch hiking back in the fall of 2005. He didn’t know the Lord when Greg picked him up, he had no direction in his life and didn’t know or particularly care where he was going. This past summer he was baptized right in the waters of the gulf.

The day was long. My body ached at the end. It was a good ache though. A wonderful family from the area had come and volunteered for the day. Their girls were a joy. All of them worked so hard and really made that first day on the line and in the kitchen incredibly memorable. Good news, it was getting warmer.

Saturday nights are movie night at the kitchen. This Saturday the movie guy was out of town and they had a singing duo to entertain us. While enjoying the music I met a nice man who lives in the FEMA trailer park. He told me he used to live in the apartments that were in the slab of concrete the Kitchen now sits on. He worked at the Waffle House that was directly in front of the apartments. After Katrina, not only was his place of employment literally washed away, his home was gone also. He was a renter, had no insurance. He comes to the kitchen daily. Many of the FEMA trailers don’t have working stoves or ovens. Listening to his story and others was bringing the reality of what had happened deeper into my heart.

Sunday came and the kitchen is closed on Sunday’s. Laverne and I didn’t have a car and were uncertain how we would get to church. We didn’t even know how we would get food later. It’s not like there are lots of restaurants around. There used to be, there just isn’t now. The Lord is so good, He was watching out for us. Laverne and I were all dressed and ready to go to church and had thought we would try to walk to some place. We had been told about a place that was just over a two mile walk. Of, course as luck would have it, it was starting to rain. Laverne looked out our little window and saw Phil. She opened the door and asked if he knew where we could rent a car. He ended up giving us a ride to church with him. There were six of us in a five passenger car. It was cozy.

We went to a Southern Baptist Church. If you think our church is a bit on the rock and roll side of things, you should see this church. Boy, were they rocking. Laverne was loving it. The message was so good. I really enjoyed the entire experience. I was where the Lord wanted me to be. The sermon was about God testing us. We simply have to have pure faith to pass the test. I needed to hear that.

Upon returning to the camp we were able to rent a car. The gentleman who came to pick us up to take us back to the car rental place told us his hurricane story. He has lived in the area all his life and no longer feels the need to stay around when one comes. He did the prudent thing and evacuated. He took five sets of clothes with him. He put all of his valuables up on the second floor. He figured that when he returned his stuff might be wet but at least it would be safe. When he returned it was gone. No, it had not been looted. The entire building had been washed away. The man started life over with only 5 sets of clothes to his name.

Once we got the car we were able to drive up to where the camp had been before. As I drove up highway 90 I could still see the immense destruction. The highway is right along the water. A prime place for beautiful homes and many businesses. Some of the homes that were here were historical homes. Those big beautiful ones I think of when I think about the south. Some were over 100 years old. I could see where the WalMart had been washed away. Hotels, casinos, restaurants, homes, stores – everything along that water front was gone. All though the destruction happened in only a few short hours, the reality of how long it would take to rebuild was becoming to come clear to me. These were towns that were built over time completely destroyed. They can’t be put back in just a year or two.

After talking with several people I have learned that in some instances trying to get the right building materials can be a minimum of a three month wait. Trying to get equipment to, either do the rest of the demolition before you can re-build or maybe the equipment necessary to re-build is another wait. Laverne had told me that one of these townships had a population of 70,000 and only about 15,000 have come back. There is really no place for them to live yet. The FEMA trailers took a long time and some folks are still waiting. I learned that the people whose homes were completely destroyed are doing better than the people with severe damage. The insurance companies don’t want to pay for water damage so, if the damage to your house was caused by the hurricane winds they’ll cover it. But if it also has damage from the tidal surge you have trouble. If there is a chance the damage is from water and you can’t prove it was wind damage the insurance companies are hesitating to pay. I was thankful that God’s Katrina Kitchen provides construction teams to assist people who don’t have anywhere else to turn.

Monday was a new day of trials for me. I found I kept asking God for patience. Some for me, and some for Harold. Harold was in charge of the kitchen for breakfast and lunch. He knows how he wants things done and there is only one way, Harold’s way. The truth, as I later learned is he knows there are other ways to do things, but he has been working in the kitchen and been a long term volunteer for so long he has figured out the best ways. It was one of those days I truly couldn’t do anything right.

I was out back at the outside sink pre-washing the dishes. One of the other long term volunteers came by and made a comment about how I was washing wrong. In pure frustration I asked what was I doing wrong now? She looked at me and knew I was whipped. She laughed for a moment and then said, everybody tells you to do something but they don’t explain how they want it done. She showed me that all she wanted me to do was to put a colander in the bottom of the sink. It would work as a strainer so food wouldn’t go down the drain and clog up the system. The colander had been put in the big trailer which holds all the dishes so I would have had no way of knowing that it needed to be in the sink. I thanked her for her help and for the first time that day felt at ease. I found myself asking God not only for patience for myself and others but for wisdom and understanding for all of us.

A group of volunteers from South Carolina had arrived at the camp. I worked with them and enjoyed their company. One lady in particular named Wendy was destined to become my friend. I made an instant connection with her and she with me. Through the years I have learned God brings people in and out of our lives for various reasons, some of which we may never know. I know she is now in my live for some reason and God wants her there. I already feel blessed by her friendship.

As the days went on I learned more and saw more. The kitchen isn’t exactly the same need it was in the early months of the crisis. Some people probably abuse it and in some cases you might think it is nothing more than a local soup kitchen. I came to know it as more. Feeding all the volunteers is so important. For some they still need the kitchen because it is truly taking so long to get back on their feet.

I met one man, his name is Kevin. Kevin was just starting a new job, at Subway. He lives with his grandmother and gets around by walking or biking. Kevin is probably I his early thirties or so. He was so proud that he was getting a job. He was also given a new bike. I asked if he liked his bike, he said “No, I love it.” At Subway there is not enough room for him to bring it in so he was having to leave it out back. I went to the store and got him a lock so hopefully his bike won’t get stolen. It’s wonderful helping people who want to help themselves.

The rest of our team arrived and we showed them around. It was nice being together if only for a few days. We worked different shifts and didn’t interact that much but when we did it was great. Colin asked me shortly after his arrival, “Have you witnessed to anybody?” There was a long pause on my part and I replied by telling him I had not, I was always busy working in the kitchen. Later this conversation was weighing heavily on my mind. After I had taken my afternoon shower I ran into my new friend Wendy. I touched on my feelings. We sat down and talked. I was concerned that I was there to serve the Lord and that I wasn’t doing it. Wendy had a way of helping me see that just by being me I was witnessing. I had taken the time to greet each person with a friendly hello and a smile. I knew peoples names and I genuinely cared about them. I was witnessing and I was using my God given talents to serve the Lord.

God gave us all different talents, singing is not one he blessed me with. Sometimes I think we get caught up in what we think something should be like and don’t except it for what it really is. I didn’t have to do anything other than be myself. God was working through me just the way I am. I don’t have to be a dreamer or a singer or an eloquent speaker. I don’t have to lay hands to heal the sick and purchase toys or bus tickets, I simply have to be me and use the talents God gave me to serve him.

What I came away with is probably indescribable. I know that I have not reached out to others in the church body. I traveled to Mississippi and met some of the nicest people and guess what, I go to church with them every Sunday. While in Mississippi I witnessed wonderful things. Amongst all the destruction and devastation was beauty. I saw couples who worship together, work together and serve the Lord together. James and Mary, Harold and Dee, Eddie and Jane, Marj and Ray are some just to name a few. As I watched them work and serve I saw the love they have for each other and the immense love they share for the Lord, I had not experienced that in my life and I really appreciated the opportunity to see it so strongly.

I’ve been asked if I would go back. My answer, if God sent me. The need is great and I didn’t truly appreciate it until I saw it with my own eyes. The need may change and have to be tweeked, but there most definitely is a need. I am thankful for the opportunity to go and serve and grow. I thank Carson for sending me without even ever knowing me. I learned that you don’t have to have extraordinary talents to serve God, just serve him with what he gave you.